had a good time serving yesterday. i felt quite guilty because i did not want to serve initially, but after seeing so many people sacrificing their time and life to serve, i just want to serve. what's more, it's with my BFF - sher! :)

and i discovered something about me yesterday together with sher which i did not really taught about it before.

i realized that i'm quite a hands-on, practical person. you teach me skills, i will remember quite well, and learn it quite fast. you teach me knowledge, i have to do and do and do and do it again and again then i will remember.

yesterday was not very busy, but busy as well. every time when i went over to the cashier to ask them to help me transact payment, i ended up being the cashier temporarily.

swiping NETS cards, swiping Credit Cards, packing items, giving receipts, collecting money.

sher asked me where did i learn my cashiering from?

i searched in my head for a moment - yeah, where did i learn that from?

i did not cross train at cashier before, so...?

then i remembered, i think it was during the short working days in AHAVA, where i was taught NETS and CC transaction procedures. though i seldom did them because i did more retail than cashiering, but i remembered them.

actually, to be honest, i like doing stuffs with my hands. i like to draw and doodle. i like to photoshop. i like to make things. i like to DO things - hands on. :)

i was just surfing someone's blog just a while ago, and a post by her really made me think quite a bit.

i remembered about 1 or 2 years ago, i got involved in a gossip-fight or something. i won't run away and say it ain't my fault entirely. but i guess i was literally dragged in pretty much. anyway to cut the story short, i realized the true character of one person, and i was pretty turned-off by it because i never expected that she could be like this.

no wonder they always say human hearts are not easy to fathom.

i have been betrayed many times!

did my part for project, but team mate claimed the credit.

did my part as a good friend, but got ditched for someone else better during partner selection.

many times!

i forgave one time after another. it wasn't easy, but i still did.

and people will ask me why am i still friends with such people who betrayed me, who, under their smiling eyes, carries a thousand lies? and even thought i was hypocritical because i know they hurt me, but i'm still friends with them, so, do i really love them as a friend? or it's just a superficial act?

and i never really had a concrete answer. today i found it.

you know, there are people out there, fighting and laying down their lives, for the ones they love - literally. every moment of their time and life is so precious. some are fighting and battling their lives in the hospital, their next moment uncertain.

and who has the time to sit down there and brood over why someone hurt you, why someone betrayed you?!

but i am not saying it's okay to be hurt and betrayed, and you treat it so lightly. but to brood over it, complaining, and lamenting over it. thinking how so-and-so hurt you, offended you, upset you, and you are thinking, "still want to friend this person anot?"

time is precious, darling.

grow bigger on the inside, and you'll understand how big the world is, how small you are, how much more you CAN do, how little you have done, how much more you have NOT done, and how much more you HAVE to do, but whether you WANT to?